Freddie Mercury's 'Exquisite Clutter'
Kristen attends 'Freddie Mercury: A World of His Own' at Sotheby’s Los Angeles.
In this house, we are Queen fans. I came to them like so many, via Wayne’s World, which I watched because a cute boy in school was always saying “Schwing” and I had to get to the bottom of it. I’m pretty sure I stole the soundtrack from my brother. Eventually, I committed enough Columbia House fraud to own multiple greatest hits CDs. I liked them for many reasons but especially for fat bottom girl representation.
Jason, a former classic rock DJ and someone who used to display his music on a bookshelf he made from plywood and cement blocks, discovered them at Age 3, via his mom’s copy of The Game, and has been a fan ever since. Jason is the kind of music fan who has so much knowledge that it’s a burden to himself and those around him. At a movie screening for Bohemian Rhapsody, he whispered every factual inaccuracy into my ear for two hours. “This isn’t when they recorded We Will Rock You!” “Freddie’s solo career didn’t break up the band!!” Imagine our surprise when the man sitting directly behind us stood up during the credits and walked up to the stage to do the Q&A. The screenwriter. Sorry to this man.
When we heard that Sotheby’s was auctioning off some of Freddie Mercury’s personal items–and touring an exhibition of them for free–we were pumped. I’d never been to Sotheby’s before. I’ve never even been to an auction, not even to a charity date auction of eligible bachelors, something that happens often on TV but rarely in real life, because in real life, most of the bachelors are ineligible.
But what I have heard about auction houses is that the people working at them will be nice to you, even if you look like a dogshit person, because they have no way of knowing if you’re secretly rich, and some of the richest people in the world look like (and are!) dogshit people.
We set out with our friend and fellow-Queen fan Lincoln for Sotheby’s in Beverly Hills. The exhibition space opened in 2021, and it’s clean, bright and airy. I expected to feel out of place, as I do most places but especially in Beverly Hills exhibition spaces. Instead, I felt welcomed. Sotheby’s LA staff were friendly, helpful, and completely unpretentious. The rumors were true! They didn’t mind that I was dogshit even a little bit, and the feeling was intoxicating. Only five minutes in, I was thinking, ”Sure! I, a striking TV writer, could bid £1000 on Freddie Mercury’s dinner party guestbook.” I mean, look at it:
It details guest lists, table placements, menus, and the gowns and jewels Freddie wore. This guestbook makes me want to be the kind of person who throws a party, has actual fun and doesn’t start doing dishes early to make people leave. Could I be that free of a person? I mean, obviously not. If I had a book like this, I would spend more time writing my little notes than enjoying the party. But still.
Other items on display included handwritten lyrics, jewelry, costumes, and artwork.
The least expensive item was this tiny, silver Tiffany & Co. mustache comb.
Sotheby’s currently estimates it could go for £400. Lincoln and I joked about going in on it together, and we could pass it back and forth like the Sisterhood of the Traveling Mustache Comb. This is something I’d be into, but I’m guessing the lower barrier to entry (as opposed to say £200,000 for handwritten lyrics to We Are the Champions) will attract more bidders and inflate the price. If we could find just two more takers, it might work, and then we’d pass this mustache comb back and forth, take it on individual adventures, and experience real personal growth.
Freddie Mercury said, “I want to lead a Victorian life, surrounded by exquisite clutter.” I do not feel this way. I spent the last month channeling my economic stress into ruthlessly purging every corner of my home. If I owned a non-Freddie-Mercury mustache comb, I would’ve already thanked it for its service and sent it to Goodwill. But a little clutter–especially loved clutter–is nice.
On our way out, a Sotheby’s staffer told us that these are just some of the items that will be up for bid in London at live auctions in August and September. She handed us her business card with a smile and said that bids can be made in person, online, or with a representative. If she knew we were dogshit people, she did not let on.
What a fun experience, I love that you got to see this. Even if you saved money on extraneous mustache combs.